Lisa Heffernan writes an article to the Atlantic regarding the pressure parents often put on their children to win soccer games.Heffernan starts off her article saying and sharing her personal experiences with her sons soccer matches and how she accompanied him on every game, on every weekend and really wanted him to win his matches. Heffernan shared the environment of the soccer games she had gone, and how she saw on the sideline, parents, cheering for all their sons on the field, all putting and hoping they would see victory for their kids. A study done on men proves winning "gives a testosterone surge" and losing "lowers hormone levels" which is the reason most fathers wanted to see their children win. She remembers the times travelling to see her son play and how she would indirectly ask her son if they would win or not. The author comes to her main point in which she affirms "Parents think they want success for their kids but in many ways they want if for themselves. Their kids, it turns out, want pizza." After Heffernan gives out that the desire to win is mostly on adults, she points out lessons that come with defeat, such as, "There is always someone better than you, at everything" and "Outcome cannot be controlled, only processes and effort." The conclusion of the essay consists of Heffernans personal example of her son, that has learned through her that besides winning perseverance and fair play are important, however he still keeps winning as a priority.
The essay starts off really well written, it gathers the attention and provokes interest to the reader. The author used a common theme such as sports and made it into something more than just a sports article, which also involves the feelings that the sport bring. Heffernan includes research on her article, which brings credibility and helps prove a key point of her argument, that man get a testosterone rush with victory. In contrasts to these elements, the authors personal examples were too general, instead of mentioning the many trips that she had to go watch her sons game she could specifically told stories that fitted the content more. The conclusion could have been perfect if she had not written the "lessons" at the end of the article. They are true, but still are general, obvious and do not quite fit the essay. The tone of the article is appropriate regarding the subject and has some humorous lies that do fit well, and the flow and word choices were also ideal to the purpose.
http://www.theatlantic.com/education/archive/2013/10/parents-ruin-sports-for-their-kids-by-obsessing-about-winning/280442/
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